Letters to the Captain

Sorry, As long as you knock Pres. Obama & are getting political - I will not subscribe.

Thank You. It's been fun.

Oconto, WI

Dear Mr. Van Den Branden: Our entire family enjoys your monthly humor tabloid, and we have for several years. It is by far and away the most popular publication I put out in my waiting room ( I am a surgeon), as it the most read and most often stolen. I respect your decision to eliminate the Washington Roast section, but I thought it was entertaining. I find Glenn Beck entertaining, and I find Jon Stewart entertaining. There is a spectrum of interests in our the wide American society, and you can't please everyone all of the time, even when your mother tells you to do so. You don't have to agree with ANYONE on some issues, and that doesn't make you a racist. One of the nice things about a newsprint newspaper is that one can read some of it, skip over some stories, and read the ones of personal interest. THAT's what we like about the Porcupine, there is a little of something in there for everyone. I have always taken your paper to be about the UP and the way you all look at life, it's your newpaper written for people who know the UP. You don't have to be politically correct, you don't have to appeal to the national audience. Presumably you do have to worry about your sales!

We don't think that you are right-wing nut jobs, nor do we think you are racists. We don't think you are left wing moon-bat koolaid drinkers, either. You all do seem to enjoy your work, and have fun publishing your paper. Please keep up the good work.

By the way, my youngest son Sam tells me that the axiom appearing at the bottom of page 2, vol 21:2 is actually his joke. He believes that he thought this one up, and that it has been spread by word of mouth throughout the state, until it reached you!

Sincerely, Paul, Olga, Gabe, Tamar, Sam Friedman
Friedman Surgical #23939

Subject: Right wing politics - We won't be renewing your magazine because of your politics. I don't need to listen to Glen Beck or the rest of your propaganda. The magazine was funny until you started this stuff. I guess you are a racist also and can't stand to have an intelligent President and not someone like Bush and Cheney. My family is from the U.P. ( Calumet) and they are not racists or Glen Beck lovers. Thank Heavens

Re: leaning left? - Say it isn't so Captain, caving in to the liberal minority because they may be upset to see reality in print form! I thought freedom of speech applied to everyone? Sure I can get my share of over the top journalism from a variety of networks expressing any view you wish to follow but I would never try to dictate the content to suit my beliefs or ideology. I subscribed to your periodical because of it's content and your style of saying what you thought was funny, politically correct, morally wrong, or insulting to the the majority of Americans without worrying that some one might get a little upset with you. As a Captain steers the ship , the Editor has to steer the magazine. Heres hoping you get back on course. Your readers will stick with you and support you I am sure!
Thanks for listening, M.Scheid

Re: they start bitching we listen! - Mike, I don't know the volume of mail you received, but changing because a few people bitch is a pet peeve of mine. In this issue for instance there are several things that could offend certain people: page 7 Bad mouthing bankers , they could be offended by being called blood suckers; page 14 atheists could be offended by God vs Science article; page 15 man outlined with beer bottles could offend alcoholics trying to recover; page 17 tattooed lady could be offending, belittling women and using them as a sex objects; page 19 woman pulling a plow again belittling women; page 37 trapping really offends PETA people. page 42 the Tiger Woods thing could offend right to life people; page 44 Very bad! babies looking like the were drunk with beer bottles spread around them MADD should be offended about that ( there was a big thing on TV showing a baby with a cigarette in it's mouth that have the social workers all upset); page 79 poking fun of blondes, that could really damage their self esteem! And this is only glancing through this issue, I just got it a few hours ago. People who don't like certain articles should just ignore and not read them. Some people wake up in the morning knowing that they are going to bitch, they just don't know what about yet. Besides if you would poll your subscribers you would probably find that 95% of them aren't liberals. The 92 year old guy thinks people who are against health care are raciest, not because Obama is trying to ruin our country! Besides, at 92 he isn't going to subscribe much longer anyway. I'm a 68 year old Vietnam Vet and I have to show ID to buy beer because some old bags want everyone to be checked, and I sure as hell don't look underage. People should just lighten up a little and just worry about themselves. Fred Giesler Sr. Two Rivers Wi. P.S. I.m sure you have seen this before but: If a conservative doesn't like guns he doesn't buy one, if a liberal doesn't like guns , he wants them all outlawed. If a conservative wants to be a vegetarian, he doesn't eat meat. If a liberal wants to be a vegetarian, he wants meat products banned for everyone. If a conservative want to be a homosexual, he quietly lives his life. If a liberal wants to be a homosexual , he demands legislated respect. If a conservative is down and out, he thinks how to better his situation. If a liberal is down and out, he wonders who is going to take care of him. If a conservative doesn't like a talk show host, he changes the channel. Liberal demands that the show be shut down. If a conservative is a non-believer he doesn't go to church. A liberal a non-believer wants ant mention of God religion silenced. If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes shopping for it, or chooses a job that provides it. A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for it! GOOD LUCK!! Fred A Giesler

Washington Roast - Dear Mike, I always enjoy reading The Porcupine Press. I started years ago, when going up to the U.P. 4 or 5 times a year I would pick up a copy. 

Some time ago I stared my subscription so I would not miss a copy. We always enjoyed the funny articles and story's of the great north. The Washington Roast section added to the enjoyment.

Yesterday I received my latest copy, and come to find out you have removed the Washington Roast just because a few left wingers (Fox hating, Obama loving socialist) threatening to drop there subscriptions. Can this be true? Is the "UP Magazine" turning into a regular left wing propaganda paper for the Democratic party, just like every other paper in this country? 

I will be watching, and I may have to drop my subscription if this becomes true!!

Respectfully, Jeff and Joan Johnson
Buchanan, Michigan

Re: Disappointment - Your decision to bow to the complaints of a couple of left wing nuts is at best very disappointing. This is a tactic they use whenever someone voices opposition or makes fun of their agenda. Cry discrimination.

Their statements that they can get the same slant on news in the state controlled media is comical. The Washington Roast section was one of the best parts of your tabloid, and with the way Washington continues to screw everything up, a consistent source of timely topics.

So you have allowed the liberals to take some of the humor out of your magazine. It is now politically correct, however at the cost of your uniqueness. You're made it BORING.

I've read the Porky Press for years and was elated that my wife gave me a subscription as a Christmas present. Next year I'm going back to socks and underwear.

Bruce Schenk • Steven Point, Wisconsin

Re: Way to give in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear Mike, I am a five year subcriber and was appauled to see the first page of Vol. 21 #2. I always was under the assumption that the capt. and his wife were down to earth people with a sense of humor. Today I was, sadfully proven wrong. How can you run a humor mag. and fold so easily? Today was the last edition I will ever look forward to getting. I am dissappointed that this is a new year and I have paid for this full year. 
Please explain to me how you can listen to a man who claims you are racist because you dont think all of the president is doing is right? I did not like all that Bill Clinton or George W. did and I'm white so does that make me racist against my own race, or am I ok because I'm dutch?
The listening of people like that will only eliminate all that you have built. Who knows there maybe alot of people who hate model trains and are going to boycott because of that- are you than going to eliminate that to keep the MINORITY happy? What of the Garlic I see some "God " references- Friar Holy Maki- Out of the Box and my obesity! Where does it all end Mike? I thought this UP Mag was the last Island of resond in this screwed up place we call the U.S.A. but appartently if you squeak people will do all that they can to quiet you.
Mike I truly have never been mad enough to do this til today! I know at least ten others who subscribe and I will be sharing my overwhelming disappointment. My advice-GROW SOME BALLS AND DO WHAT YOU WANT TODO! IT'S YOUR MAG. AND WE ARE JUST FORTUNATE THAT YOU SHARE IT WITH US! 

Thanks for your time, besides today I have always loved the UP Mag.
(haven't always agreed-but I have a sense of humor too.)
Thanks for sharing YOUR mag and YOUR sense of humor,
Tom

P.S. There was only one thing in there I forgot to plead with you and the crew- please don't go democrat and assume the 21% who oppose reflect the 79% who agree strongly.